As finals approach, The Real Transition Team has compiled a few pre-finals motivational statements. Fortunately though, as this is Ave Maria, we've one upped the competition and have released the first batch of what AMSOL has proudly dubbed "Monaghan-ators".

These sayings can be purchased in the bookstore starting Monday in the form of Ensure mugs and palm tree ornaments. Donations are also appreciated and can be left in the shoebox clearly marked "OPUS DEI".

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1. No matter what they tell you, new fangled internet technology will only hurt you.

2. If you think no one cares, try missing a final exam.

3. If at first you don't succeed, destroy any evidence that you tried. ... Then move to Florida.

4. He who laughs last obviously didn't get the joke. And, boy, was it funny.

5. They only admitted you because they knew you wouldn't come.

6. The quality isn't getting worse, you're just getting pickier.

7. A law school professor is just a lawyer you haven't alienated yet.

8. If ignorance were bliss you'd actually be happy. And transitioning.

9. The best things in life - like hope - are already taken.

10. Dedication + High performance + Accreditation = 0

And last but not least - keep in mind:

11. Things are never so bad that they can't get worse.



/s/ Deus Ex